Introducing myself....to myself

When I sit down at my laptop to write, like I did 14 years ago, all I can think of is how different I am from the person I was when I first started blogging. I do not recognize that person at ALL. I look at her and wish I could give her a hug, and sit her down to explain what really matters and does not matter in the long run. 

I look at that girl and feel such love and protectiveness for the bubbly, funny, loving, energetic, kind, would do anything for the ones she loves, twenty-something year old. I look at that girl and feel frustration and anger for the person she tried to be for everyone else. The perfect mom, wife, daughter-in-law, daughter, and friend. Looking back, over the years, I have realized that I lost myself trying to please everyone else.

Life is long. Lessons are learned. And a huge lesson I have learned over the past few years is how much I changed to become who I thought everyone else wanted me to be. I changed so much that I became unrecognizable to myself. 

As my therapist has told me - now that I know what I now know, the real anger will begin. The anger over all the wasted years I could have been being my authentic self. It's never too late to find yourself again, and that is exactly what I'm doing.